What do you think of yourself? Where does your self-worth come from? Maybe it is from, your accomplishments, or your job, or maybe from your husband or your kids. It seems that at times or seasons in our lives, we all look to someone or something to find our value, our worth. I know for me, it has been everything from my job, to my kids, to how much I managed to get done in the house in a day.
But what happens when the thing/person you found your worth in is taken from you or does something that leaves you feeling worthless? Where do you find your worth then?
I don’t know if there is anything that makes you feel more worthless, than betrayal. When that betrayal comes at the hands of someone who promised to love and cherish you forever, it cuts to the very core of your being.
When I met my husband, it felt as if I had found a missing part of myself. We complimented each other in so many ways. One of the things he wrote in our wedding vows, was that he no longer felt like anything was missing in his life, because as long as I was in his life, he had all that he desired. That was how our marriage was, each of us filling in the gaps of the other one.
When after nearly 13 years of marriage, he walked out on me and our 3 children, I didn’t know what to think. To say I was shattered would be an understatement. It was as if I was watching a house burn to the ground, but it wasn’t a house, it was my life; and as the ashes piled up around me from the destruction that event had on my heart, the feelings of worthlessness began to set in.
Why doesn’t anyone want me? Why does everyone leave me? What is wrong with me?
If you have suffered betrayal, or abandonment, you have probably asked yourself those same questions.
You see the world teaches us that we are nothing unless we have the right husband, the right job, the right clothes, the right amount of money and the list goes on and on and on. Our worth is measured in success and in the value that others place on us.
However, that is NOT what God teaches us. You see our worth, is based on something far greater than a husband, far more valuable than our bank accounts and something that can NEVER be taken from us.
Our worth is based on Christ and what HE has done for us. A pastor in my church once gave me this statement from Robert S. McGee as a reminder …
“I have great worth apart from my performance because Christ gave His life for me, and therefore, imparted great value to me. I am deeply loved, fully pleasing, totally forgiven, accepted, and complete in Christ.”
Just let that statement sink in for a minute. How would your life change if you really lived this way? If you walked around knowing in your heart that: no matter what job you had, no matter if you were married or single, no matter what your bank account said, no matter what type of phone you had, clothes you wore, car you drove or house you lived in, no matter what others thought of you or said about you, no matter how good or bad you performed, no matter how many mistakes you made, you were loved, accepted, and valuable. Would that change the way you view yourself? What if you woke up each day, remembering that you are loved by the creator of the universe? Loved so much that if you were the only person on this earth, Jesus would have gone to the cross for you, FOR YOU, so that you could be in relationship with God. Would where you find your self-worth change?
It did for me. After experiencing the worst rejection of my life, I needed to find a place where I could safely find my self-worth without having to worry about it being trampled. It was then I realized that my self-worth needed to come from the only place it ever should have come from. From my Father, God.
My worth is secure because Jesus said “…it is finished!” John 19:30
My worth is secure because God’s love for me is secure.
” For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39
“For God so loved the world(this includes you so put your name in place of “the world”) that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” John 3:16
When are worth is found in something that can never be lost, in someone who will NEVER stop loving us; when it is found in Jesus rather than in what we do it helps us to see ourselves as we truly are….PRICELESS.